Life Update

Shared this with my Amazon group and thought it would make a decent blog post to try and explain some things...

I'll be honest, it's getting harder and harder and I don't even know why sometimes. Feel in such a rut and can't convince myself to just let go and try and do things differently and hope for something to change and make things work better.... keep knowing I need to go to bed earlier, to try and get up earlier to be on time for work but got stuck in such a routine that even the thought of trying something different is so hard.

I look back to all the times that I struggled the last few years and what it was that brought me out into a better routine (I can pin point Nov 2020, late Jan 2021 and then this new year) and the answer seems more complicated than simple... a few times recently I've thought maybe the change is coming, that tomorrow I'll feel better and maybe if I just go with it things will be great, it's almost happened a few times.... but then I just get no sleep, or stay up too long or have broken sleep or just flat out convince myself that it's dangerous to just go along with it.

Work are really good, my colleague Gemma is a really good soundboard to help when I'm struggling and even though HR have now noticed and questioned that I've not been in work before 9am (due to various issues with sleep and figuring out a routine in the morning) since early 2021 bar a few days (likely when I've had to make my own way to work rather than a lift so therefore had to force a change in routine); we've had a long chat and they are amazing and are now trying to at least work alongside me to try and figure it out and how we can make it work and sort something that works even if it is just getting me back on track and on time at the moment.

I do acknowledge that a lot of this can begin with my Aspergers, that the idea of routine changing can be terrifying but I feel for so many years I've been a shining example of how to fight against this and manage... my weekly routine even now can change at points and I manage quite well, but it's usually the evenings where I do different things which is another thing, I love to be busy but I rarely allow myself to be at home that long; maybe it's just because I know being busy helps to distract when it can, and if I was just at home I'd overthink things and get restless or it's just knowing I can get out there and do so many fun things and live life when I can.

But I'll be behind on so much TV as I'll just watch stuff when I get home before bed and sometimes even then I'll fall asleep first... and then wake up and go to bed late for some broken sleep. Last night I was wide awake for ages watching telly, and I thought maybe I could go to sleep earlier now while I'm awake, I felt alright in that moment but I just stayed awake till my usual late time and then had broken sleep due to maybe dreams not sure what it was.

Maybe I attribute not liking being at home too much due to all the isolation we did the last few years, or it's just the idea of getting out and seeing friends and doing things that make me happy.... work itself has been a crutch for a long time, especially during pandemic and lockdown... something to do every day and a place to go and spend days doing work and keeping distracted.

There were times I'd panic that I didn't have enough to do during the day to keep myself occupied which then led to the days work building up to a lot to do in the afternoon... work has gotten much busier now with things opening up and such, but even then we're now split between a few of us so we each have stuff to do but sometimes it's not enough to keep me distracted throughout the day though at least I have Gemma and Vanessa to chat to about things.

So there will be days where someone is off and I have more to do and those days go quicker because I'm doing more work, but then I can get behind on other things but I also miss people when they're off too so it's lonelier... and we've now moved to a much smaller and stuffier building which can feel a bit boring too depending on the day or just plain like being boxed in a corner to a degree... it works much better than I thought it would but it would certainly explain more why it can feel a struggle too. I do really like my job though and the people I've met along the way so don't really want to move on because there's lots of security blankets in place of how understanding they are and the comfort I have in that flexible routine so going somewhere else wouldn't have that at all most likely and why would I want to do something else? I am wondering whether at some point a change in role would be a thing but there's a lot more to that too, but it would be something I'm very good at and keeps me busier

Apart from the fact that almost most things I do now in terms of house, work and other stuff reminds me of so much stuff over the past two years but I need to learn to manage... it's not a case of changing every single thing so it doesn't feel repetitive being in the same house and job as when I was struggling.... because not every day can feel different and new and exciting when everything is the same but I don't know what I can do about that apart from cope

Apologies for the long post and ramblings, just wanted to try and put words out there and in a safe space... to try and make sense of something, even if it makes absolutely no sense. I just can't figure out how I can't help myself to just get on with it and feel good....

Even now I think there's probably even more to it....

Active

My Crazy Existence!

 

This is a story all about how, my life got flipped turned upside down….

How my life was previously (not even that long ago, circa Jan to March 1^st, 2021 and as such before that in the midsts of 2020):

In the week; most nights whilst working, I would typically go to bed 3:30am- 4am (which is admittedly late, this is more 2021 and late 2020, as before that is probably more 2-3am and these things gradually get later) and then wake up about 8:05am and manage the day wonderfully. Always have plenty to do at work, no day is perfect so up and downs, but still have a great solid day at work (maybe I can be last minute out the door most mornings, but nobody's perfect and we've all done it but I’d still manage it and getting there bang on 9am usually) and then in the evenings I’d come in and chill for a bit with whatever the plan was for that evening… maybe have tea either earlier or nearer like maybe 11pm depending on what the evening entailed. Then have that hour or two or three after midnight having a little snack and watching something and maybe chatting online, then usually about 3am I'd start doing a few things to be getting ready for bed and then to get in bed; it usually tended to be around 3:30am but sometimes a little later. It wasn’t perfect in most eyes but for me it worked an absolute treat and was my routine, the weeks then whizzed by beautifully and life was nice… I ate what I wanted and what I felt I needed to eat for the meals during the week without worries and had a few great snacks in between… everything seemed to be pretty good.

Then typically at the weekend, because I do tend to worry about lying in when I’ve been up early every morning (something that harks back to the 2008 issue which can be covered some point in the future); I’d then tend to go to bed at 5am or 6am instead on a Friday night, sometimes just because I fall asleep for a few hours and then wake up about 3am and then maybe watch something for a bit and otherwise just because and then I'd usually be able to just about sleep through till about 10:30- 11am give or take. Sometimes the same on a Sunday, that’s usually more like going to bed about about 3-4am and then up about 9am for church at 10am, previously 10:45 in normal times. On a Saturday especially I tend to take my time doing things, like usually having breakfast a bit later than usual and the same with the other meals, but in a way that is perfectly manageable without ever getting too late. I do love my Saturday routine and as crazy as it can seem to some watching it unfold on a Saturday (like parents and Ben), it really has worked for me (so much so, that it became my day to day routine during the two week isolation period that started January due to COVID-19. Which became a crazy two weeks but I managed really well in the end due to that routine).

On those days in the week during isolation, I’d only usually have those four hours sleep but still manage to function perfectly fine for a day of obviously not doing much and not being able to leave the house but the routine would be similar to that of a Saturday, with everything done a bit later; it was my way of coping and making sure that I could manage how my day went without worrying too much, especially since I couldn't go anywhere. Obviously my worry was already massive from being stuck at home all day every day for two weeks and not able to get back into the work rhythm and routine that I thrived on that we mentioned earlier, so it was really tricky already.

This Saturday routine as well as the ones for Sunday and other days all tend to stem from formative and traumatic experiences that I experienced back in October and September and November of 2008 (hence the 2008 issue) which we can get into as we go along in future blogs maybe like I mentioned before in order to understand why I do a lot of what I do and why I’m very strict with my routine and find it hard to make changes and adjustments sometimes and why I worry about the slightest thing changing in them.

These particular experiences (the 2008 issue) like I say may come up in future blogs if I want to discuss them because they’ll probably explain a whole bunch of reasons to why I am the way I am and why it is that certain things might have happened recently in the loosest way of explaining that there is. Rather than being directly responsible maybe (though they are guilty), they’re seemingly part of a truckload of thoughts and feelings and anxieties that coalesced one day to shove my body right off track from that lovely routine and good feeling.

But that is just how my routine was previously, at least when at its best. So from the ending of isolation on January 19^th all the way through to March 1^st and then even before that, roughly from November 1^st through to December 20^th just before Christmas. During Christmas and New Year and during isolation is much different of course due to having different coping routines, plus I did struggle over the Christmas period due to having to change my routine and with that some anxieties linked once more to the 2008 issue loomed their head and made it tough. As an example, in this particular case and in quite a few other cases over the years (2016 and 2017 being biggies) in which the 2008 issue has popped to the front of my mind and done its thing; it has been a case of approaching a week from Saturday to Friday and not wanting the events of the 2008 issue to happen in the same way as they did a particular week at the end of October 2008... that week, whilst to others might be seeming harmless on the surface; but to me they were tough and the end result was probably the worse that I’ve ever felt, so naturally I’ve never wanted to get back to that feeling or if I've wondered if it would happen again would it be even worse. Which technically it could be; seeing as how it seems to be affecting me at the moment and through all of those years even before anything happened; the power of that event is seemingly such a thing that you can’t just brush it aside. Some events in life, they re-occur and you just sigh at them, whereas even the thought of it happening again now is bad enough; even if you can think to yourself every now and then "Is it really that bad a thing?" but it becomes less about most of the lead up and how that felt and more about that end result of how I felt at the end). Before November of last year, there was actually a week or two at the end of October last year that was very similar to October of 2008 in my worries of the similarities. Mainly because the dates seemed lined up with the dates in 2008, just seemingly one day off in each case so I felt I had more reason to worry just from the sheer comparison. But in the case of this and in December and in January I did get through them mainly just because it was a case of tackling that particular week frame or the weeks head on with the idea that once I got to November in October or in the case of isolation, it was once I got back to work that things could carry on and they did actually do that and do it really well. But now something seems to have clicked, and I can’t seemingly seem to find a way back or a way out of the current way that I feel and trying to figure out how it’s started to affect me. It seems that its beginnings and roots that started on March 1^st and 2^nd last week may have big links to what happened in October last year and of course the 2008 issue.

So that's how we were and a bit of how we got to where we are maybe... in the next blog we'll explore more of how we got to where we are and maybe where it is we are now

Stay classy

Christmas Movies: Miracle on 34th Street (1994)

You probably find yourself sat in shock and fear; there are words I'm reading as opposed to words mumbled in a wood somewhere. Well technology has failed me, so a big long walk today didn't throw up many visual benefits though it's always nice to go for a walk in the woods and accumulate more mud than a weekend at Glastonbury. But oh well... it's now the 4th of December at the time of writing this blog, maybe it's good fortune that faulty phones and unreliable cameras have forced me to return to the realm of actual good old fashioned internet blogging as opposed to running around with a camera filming myself talking in the same location, or in the case of this week a location I hadn't been to for a while but still quite familiar and to be honest it looks very much the same as a lot of the other places (apart from that time I blogged up the Arc de Triomphe and you couldn't hear what I thought of Spider-Man: Far from Home, spoilers it was excellente). So here I return to this humble blog website (presuming I post this missive on my blogspot and not just a Facebook post that one person browses and doesn't comment) to talk about movies old and movies new as I would do in a weekly video blog.


So, since I last filmed a video and briefly talked about what movies I saw last week and explained to you in cold hard facts (I briefly said yes it is) how Die Hard is a Christmas movie and probably talked a few random Christmas movies I'd seen; what new movies and what old movies have I seen? Well in the old realm (though not that old, don't make me feel ancient) we have the marvellously underrated 2014 gem Get Santa with features one absolutely belting Santa in Jim Broadbent (he's definitely in the top leagues, though more on the best one of all later) plus the lovely Rafe Spall in the lead (weird to think he was one that guy in Shaun and Hot Fuzz) not to mention Doctor Who herself Jodie Whittaker and the wonderful Stephen Graham and Warwick Davis to name but a few.... it's a purely magical and lovely Christmas tale for everyone from the director of Severance and Triangle (as you do); I also got the yearly family viewing of National Lampoons Christmas Vacation in the can, a pure Christmas classic and there's not much that needs to said... you all know the scenes and the quotes, it's hilarious and lovely. I also watched Love Actually which is in a similar vein, you all know it well. It's crazy how many people are in that film, what a cast!

I also went to the cinema for a special screening of Moulin Rouge! One of my absolute favourite movie, and as expected every second was a joy... nicely helped by the Everyman Cinema in Liverpool and it's seating which is comprised of cushy sofas and waiter service. And again in tradition I rewatched Planes Trains and Automobiles which should be a blog in itself because like Moulin Rouge it's one of the most perfect movies there is.

In the realm of new movies, I've seen a trilogy of new cinema releases... two are great, and one is perfectly lovely. I saw the new Rhian Johnson murder mystery Knives Out (and yes, Last Jedi is still excellent so come at me haters) which stars a delectable Daniel Craig as a southern detective plus a stellar cast of suspects including Captain America himself and Jamie Lee Curtis to name but two... it's funny, and dark and utterly great fun. I saw the new Charlies Angels reboot, which is way better than internet people will have you believe (or some reviews too). For starters, the internets favourite punching bag Kristen Stewart is a delight here... super funny and charming, which is great because she's always great in everything and people are stupid. The other guys are also fun, with Patrick Stewart and Sam Claflin always welcome delights... it's fun and it's super feminist, I loved it!

Then there's Last Christmas (you wouldn't believe this was a blog leading to talking about Miracle on 34th Street would you?) which I saw last night... which has unfairly been kicked around a bit, it's Christmas so films are allowed to be super flawed. It's got a ton going for it; Emilia Clarke is fantastic in the lead role, she's funny and charming and I love those green shoes she wears. Whilst Henry Golding is utterly charming and bonkers too, it's a great story and some really interesting characters and the choice to weave Wham! music throughout is a great one. It's just at the end of the day, a bit just ok... it's really enjoyable and there's some amusing laughs throughout and Emma Thompson is always dependable even if her character is a bit of a straightforward nagging mum character. The message within it is super strong and really special and I loved that.... it's just as a whole, it's just fun and then yeah that's it. They could have done more with the Wham music rather than it's just there, maybe a musical with the songs working the narrative? And the final twist is pretty corny even if again it's a sweet message and works into the story as a whole, it's just once you see it coming it's super obvious and I twigged fairly quickly what might be happening. But it's Christmas and it's lovely and I still recommend this warm hug of a movie from a director who I love (Paul Feig, he of Bridesmaids and A Simple Favour).

That's enough old and new films, let's talk.... an old film! Namely the 1994 remake of Miracle on 34th Street starring Sir Richard Attenbrough as the best Santa in cinema (bar none!). This is the point where I normally stand in a film, sorry a field (I like to keep the spelling mistakes in, the same as all my verbal mistakes stay in the videos) and talk about this in length... sometimes making no sense and rambling and sometimes saying the same point over and over again. Except this time you get a brief clip that my phone allowed me to film before it gave up and then this written transcript (ish) of the sort of things I would have said and maybe (hopefully) it's a little more eloquent and intriguing and less repetitive; but we'll see...

Back in the Winter of 1994, I was just a small 8 year old me... I remember I very well though because that Christmas we went as a family to see The Pagemaster (Liverpool Showcase) and The Nightmare before Christmas (UCI Warrington); I remember Pagemaster most vividly because, well it's a vivid and memorable movie from it's fun plot to it's wonderful (for a young me, and for 1994 at least) visuals... but also because you always remember a trip with some background, just that I remember my mum was at University at the time in Liverpool and she came to meet us after Uni at the cinema; not the most riveting story but there you go. That Christmas as far as I recall, we didn't see this one at the cinema (maybe Mum and Dad thought it too cerebral for us, it is a cut above the usual family fare in terms of what kids would enjoy) but would later experience it on video (my guess at least) and then it cemented itself sweetly as a firm Christmas staple for years to come, not just mine but one of my mums favourites too. It really isn't hard to see why too...

Sure, the 1947 version is a classic... for starters, it has one of the absolute best and most original trailers there is (insert link) and obviously being the original version of the story that has its pluses too; the cast are great and the story is lovely. But growing up with this version, and mainly due to just how incredibly terrific Dickie is as Kriss Kringle... I genuinely can't go anywhere else but this for my Miracle fix. Like I said though, and like I said tenfold with the Home Alone II argument; none of this means the original 1947 version is anything other than an utter delight and masterpiece. I'm simply going to argue why I like this one that bit more and the most and why it's such a staple for me come Christmas time.

I do feel going in that a lot of the basic story elements and ideas that appeal so much can be traced back to the original so the argument could easily be made that why not go with the original. But some things can be simplified and defined so easily, it's what we grew up with and the people we know and love (and I really do love Mara Wilson, she's so lovely and my research shows me that she's only a year younger than me so we're both of the same era and she's grown up into such a cool and funny human being; seriously check her out online she's awesome and still as cute as ever). But if anyone sells this apart from the rest, it's the majesty that is Sir Richard Attenbrough as Kriss Kringle... he certainly makes a believer out of me. From the supreme twinkle to the quiet vulnerability, he's so wonderful and so powerful in his performance that he really sells this character and you find yourself truly believing that this man is the real deal and that the character of Santa definetly exists (of course we all know he does anyway, am I right?)... it's a really hard thing to sum up other than to say it's a thing of magic and wonder what he does and it's amazing and it totally sets this one apart for me, though factors such as Mara Wilson as well as the dynamic duo of Elizabeth Perkins and Dylan McDermott also; who are both utterly magnetic and charming.

 

 

The idea of a story where the magic of Christmas is put in danger by factors so simple and everyday is a unique one, and that basic idea has been done elsewhere too (Get Santa, The Santa Clause) but the court drama and the family drama really makes this one a bittersweet and special tale. There's a reason this story is so beloved and that this version is so beloved by me especially... not to mention some of you who commented when I asked about it online (Charlotte and Alice to name two, and with apologies to John who really isn't a fan). Leave a comment if you too find this a favourite at this time of year or if you don't (I'd love to hear both sides of the argument).


The great season of December really is upon us, and with it will come two more videos (or written blogs like this depending on technology) as we discuss the two best Christmas movies that there are. It's up to you to guess what those are, though those who know me well will already have an idea... this really is the best time of year, the good feeling and the magical feeling in the air are always something I treasure and the opportunity to show kindness and humility to your fellow man is just a way of saying December is like my whole year really. Peace and goodwill to all mankind, always.

So until next week, let it snow let it snow let it snow (just imagine if it did). Christmas really is starting now

Just when you thought it was safe to re-enter the blogosphere....

Bonus Blog!

Sometimes they Come back, again and again and again and again....

Well hello there, it's another blog post... it's been a while I admit, but that's just me being lazy and never getting round to typing. But in looking for something, I did find a little hidden gem that I'm gonna share that will lead up to the eventual big blog post that has been in the works for ages... yes, it's No. 6 in the Horror Countdown, it had been typed and never posted... and I'm gonna share it here after a brief but lengthy and waffley waffle cone. Then this will tee up nicely into the Top 5 when I get round to doing it in 2031....

So, since my last post... what's new, what's groovy and what's in the hoover?

Well the last post was a year ago and was all mushy and wonderful and didn't offer a lot of movies or things I'd been doing and then before that was 2015 so a lot has happened and a lot hasn't happened. Plenty of movies have been out, almost too many to mention (but The BFG, Sing Street, Popstar, Room, Colossal, Logan, Detroit, It, Dunkirk, The Force Awakens, Rogue One, Monster Calls, Moana, Nice Guys, Civil War, Jungle Book, High Rise, Deadpool, Sisters, The Walk, Me and Earl and the Dying Girl, Everest to name a few few few) and TV (oh so many but Jessica Jones, Game of Thrones, Scream Queens and Kimmy Schmidt to name a few select ones) and music and all that good stuff.... I've been working away with its highs and lows, doing quite well to the moment and gaining more experience and more responsibilities and experiences....

There's been a dash of the ol' Open Mic magic and Switcheroos are ever prevelant and occasional... Switcheroo being my photo project where me and a friend take before and after photos where we switch places and outfits... it's a big bit of fun but also a comment on gender and clothing and how it defines us.... spread the word!

And my friends, oh my friends are just amazing.... I mean there's Ros, who I literally see every week now and we always try and do something whether it's our Game of Thrones nights or just cinemas or nights in. There's my three Berry angels, Nesha Tonia and Ranina... who are all just the best, mostly at the moment it's popping to Manchester to spend quality time with Tonia who is just the best to spend time with, we always get on so well and chat loads of in depth stuff which helps us both.

Steph is amazing, always lovely and friendly and great to chat to, we have so much fun when we catch up.... there's Jemma who is my switcheroo friend and has been helping me a ton with it all and is just amazing....

Pete obviously is one of my longest friends and just rocks and is responsible for many an open mic, there's Mikey Prince who is simply the loveliest dude and is so crazy and fun and lovely whilst Amy is one of the most treasured people I know, she is glorious and lovely and very close to my heart. Cara is just always on my wavelength with the movie stuff and other random stuff and we have the best how we met story as well as other random stories and she is so lovely, her smile just makes my day and my face makes her cry and we only meet when I'm running around.

There's my work friends who are just the loveliest bunch of loyal legends you could meet... Tim my chaffeur and crazy buddy, the lovely Suzanne and Anita, the wonderful Aaron and Phil, the fabulous Philomena and June, the lovely Joan, the ace Alvin and Alex, lovely Laura, and the lovely Wendy

Bernie is an incredibly loyal friend and I consider her family, she's terrific and there's Becky Owens, one of my very oldest friends, living a bit further away now so been a while but she's always there for me... whereas Jonty and Neil, two of my REALLY oldest friends are just amazing! Then goodness, there's Chelsea and Helen and Sophie and Bobbie and Steph and Maff and so on.....

Anyway, enough about me onto the main event....

The Horror Countdown: Number Six!

Jaws (1975) 
Rated: 12
Directed by Steven Spielberg

There are those films that are timeless... they're stone cold, a dead cert, absolute classics... but being horror movies as well? Sure they clearly are to some degree, but it still catches you by surprise in a way, no matter how obvious it could really... because to a lot of people, these films would clearly be defined as classic horror... but even then, to a majority of people it would be a case of 'Oh yeah, so it is I guess'.... they'll recognize it as being a horror to a degree but not really put it up there with the greats of the genre because they see it as a fantasy or a drama or an adventure or simple summer blockbuster fare or fluff to a degree, with the tension and the action and what have you, but horror? Is it really that scary?

I can do this on occasion with Jurassic Park, because it's certainly scary enough to send me running a lot of the time (see also the recent Jurassic World), but sometimes I find myself wanting to put it amongst my favourites of scary horror films but then beginning to think 'Is it really up there with such and such?' (But you'll be getting no spoilers for the remainder of the big list, you cheeky thing you). But in this particular case, Jaws is such a darn good movie, a genuine bonafide masterclass in tension and scariness.... it's both terrifying and merciless and pretty downright scarring for life at moments (admit it, who doesn't swim anymore ever?) but then when you want to categorize it, I think that easily not enough people would probably really give it the full blown credit that it fully deserves for how just how damned good a horror movie it really is.... it's a really curious thing.

One of the pretty well known things to begin with, is that a lot of the well built up tension, suspense and scares of the movie are brought around by pure coincidence and happenstance... because originally the shark was going to be seen in the movie a hell of a lot more than you do in the final movie. You were going to see him a lot, and boy do I mean a lot! But as fate had it, they couldn't get the model/ animatronic shark to work as well as they wanted it to, so they reduced the screentime for the shark by a considerable amount to what they could manage.... so much so one documentary about the movie later went on to be called 'The Shark is still Working' which I hear is a fantastic and thorough documentary on the making of this movie, so check that out too.

But anyway, because of the limited screentime of the actual shark in the flesh... the mood of a lot of the actual film is more about suggestion and the unknown and what we do not see... which lends a lot to the tension and atmosphere of the piece itself. So it's quite coincidental and fortuitous that this came to pass and we have the film the way it was... because imagine how it might have worked if we've had the shark in most of the film, doing its thing and maybe being a bit too corny. The script and the story would still have been the same, so no doubt it might still have been a pretty decent film but one of the films strong suits is it's sense of what you don't see (something nicely employed by Spielberg in a whole bunch of his films, E.T and Jurassic Park being too where you don't always see things straight away... there is a lot of suggestion and shadows beforehand).

Another great thing and element in this movie is the casting and the central trio who we follow through the story, not to mention the rich tapestry of fun and interesting characters that populate both the story and the wonderful town of Amity itself, from the unscrupulous Mayor through to Bad Hat Harry, the local town fishermen, Ben Gardner and Mrs. Kintner amongst others. You have the terrific Roy Schneider as our lead Chief Brody... a strong and determined character, who just wants to do good by people and has his own personal fears to overcome (chiefly the water) in pursuit of stopping the menace that has entered the area, but ultimately hits particular snags along the way (like not being able to close the beach due to a run in with the Mayor, which ultimately leads to the death of the Kintner boy as a result) but in the end, buckles himself in and sets off in pursuit becoming the reluctant hero this film needs, and Schneider is just fantastic in this role... both headstrong and determined but ultimately with his flaws and problems too.

Try telling Quint he has problems though (and boy does he) and you'll be in a spot of bother. Played oh so tremendously by Robert Shaw (so mesmerising as Red Grant in From Russia with Love), Quint is the definition of a very troubled 'crusty old sea dog' though maybe not that old, with his tales of encounters at sea and a personal vendetta against the shark it seems... his tale is a fascinating one and his fate is I guess, sadly inevitable....

Completing the trio is a never more wonderful Richard Dreyfuss as Matt Hooper, the nerdy Oceanographer who comes on board to help find the shark, study it and then in the end help to capture and stop it. His is a performance that mixes sly humour, intelligence, false bravado and basic honesty and in the end is probably the character we love the most because he says what we're thinking a lot of the time and sometimes reflects how we feel too.

These themes, and these characters plus that ever surmounting tension is all tantamount to what makes Jaws such an enduring classic and a masterful piece of cinematic history. The fact it can continue to terrify us all at the same time is just one more fantastic reason to continuously watch this movie again and again.... and then go for a nice swim....

So that's all for now on this one, till we meet again....

You stay classy,

Ribbles

As long as you're still smiling, there's nothing more I need...

Hey you, you with the smile and the beautiful soul.... that's a lot of you, if it isn't then hey you're free to read this too :)

While I keep up the business of eventually getting round to writing an actual blog and finishing the countdown of the best horror movies and it being that time of year, surely I should but I'll inevitably end up leaving it a bit longer and it'll be so dated it might as well feature Rachel Leigh Cook....

Till then I just want to share my thanks for my friends and for the good times in the midst of a strange and peculiar time of life as Edward Norton once lamented as the buildings crumbled to the sound of the Pixies....

It's the year of my 30th birthday and as such I've had biggish plans... I had a fabulous birthday meal and a terrific tea party with some of the my dearest and closest friends. I saved big style a ton of money to go on a big family trip this summer to California for two weeks including Disney, Universal and Hollywood trips with my mum, dad and my nephew Ben.... there's been a ton of nostalgia and looking back into the past and other interesting memories and of course with that comes good and bad memories and times. 

Funny though how when something this interesting and exciting happens, it always comes with a downside too.... I have IBS as far as I can tell, the doctors always say that's probably it whenever I go and it flares up and it's done it again this year, and that combined with my already active mind and form of autism... it causes me to get more nervous so that made going away interesting..... in the end I still had a great holiday, it just made preparing to go away more nerve wracking and once or twice while away made things slightly harder, like I maybe didn't eat as much or sometimes found it hard to be comfortable. 

So this coming right in the middle of the summer not only affected the holiday but also made me feel a bit queasy around my birthday too and is moving on through the autumn still a bit to now, which has built up the anxiety and led to maybe a slight depression.... and all this is what it is, it sucks hard but the point I'm getting to is my friends.... whereas maybe a time in the past where this could have happened before, it would've sucked and I'll always have family and a few friends, but then the friendship base was maybe limited.

We didn't have social media and stuff so keeping in touch with the friends you did have was trickier and they didn't know as immediately what you were going through to be there so swiftly as they can now with a message or a comment on a post you post or text even.... and in the past, my friendship base has always had something but through the last few years it seems to multiply more and more to the bursting point of such fabulous amazingness that I have so many more true and wonderful friends over the years... so much more now than I ever did....

The point being, that during these hard times... any time it seems hopeless or I feel a bit down... straight away I can reach out and get endless messages and chat with some of the most amazing and beautiful people there are. The second I even think anything isn't worth it or what's the point... I suddenly picture Nesha or Ros or Chelsea beaming and smiling and offering kind words and suddenly the world seems all brand new (thanks Bryan Adams) or I can just imagine Cara doing the sad happy face she does when we meet and I'm a mush

Friends are so hard to get right, but when you're one lucky son of a gun like I am... you simply strike it so lucky and are blessed from here to eternity....

Any of you in my friendship circle... if you're ever down or worried, just reach out because I'm guaranteed if it isn't me (and that won't happen because I am so there for all of you equally) then because we all know each other of the amazing people, that those beautiful creatures will be there for you too... so never feel alone or be alone, obviously take time for yourself too but never be too quiet... always try and feel the love to make it through another day!

You are loved and I love you!     

We're Back! A Horror Countdowns' story!

The first name in terror returns....

Well you'll have seen how my Top 25 favourite Horror Movies list is shaping up so far, and you heard a bunch about my current fun life in the last installment... so far you've seen from Number 25 all the way through to Number 11... so clearly it's time for the top ten of this list, the best of the best and the most smashing of creepy classics. You don't need much waffle about my current events... from a load of great films and TV through to various parties and fun, it's business as per usual. So we start with Numbers 10- 7, and then the next blog will go from there into the top five.... anyway I don't really need to waffle too much, let's get into it straight away then:

10. Let the Right One In (2009) Rated 15
    Directed by Tomas Alfredson

Thanks in no small part to the insane popularity of Twilight and those damn sparkly fiends... the vampire genre, not just of movies but television and books and all sorts, is now more popular than ever before. Thankfully some good can come from that (heck knows that a majority of the movies coming out on this wave of popularity are frankly a pile of poo) in the form of Tomas Alfredson (who later went on to direct the rather terrific Tinker Tailor Soldier Spy) and his adaptation of acclaimed novel Let the Right One In. In the traditional Hollywood fashion, yes there did wind up being an American remake.... the good news about that is it was actually pretty solid, not least thanks to the inclusion of Richard Jenkins and Chloe Grace Moretz amongst the cast as well as Cloverfield and Dawn of the Planet of the Apes director Matt Reeves at the helm.... sure it doesn't quite match the powerful original but it managed to be solid enough.... but that's not the film we're here to discuss....

Important fact out of the way first, yes this film is from Sweden and yes it's in Swedish. Just read the subtitles and be done with it..... job done. Anyway.... the film focuses on a young boy, Oscar, in small town Sweden in the 1980s... struggling to fit in, being bullied and being a general loner. That is, until he meets Eli... a peculiar young girl who he immediately clicks with and they become best friends... but is it more than that, and is Eli all she seems? With mysterious disappearances occuring around the village and Eli displaying peculiar behaviour.... anything is possible

What impresses most about this modern masterpiece is it's subtlety.... whereas the remake does tend to go for some most obvious shocks and effects, outside of a terrible cat sequence and a few well placed thrills, this is a much more low key affair than your typical horror film at points, while still chilling and providing a jolt when it needs to. It's helped a lot by the performances of the two leads.... both very natural and very mature, and one big twist that isn't even a twist more something you need to decide for yourself, makes the performances that much more interesting. Beautifully directed and shot.... this is one friendship and romance story with a big twist that works oh so very well....

9. An American Werewolf in London (1981) Rated 18
   Directed by John Landis

When people talk about this movie, they always talk about and cite the incredible make up effects and transformation scene and rightly so, because it's extraordinary.... most werewolf movies since and before fail to really match how visceral and painful and well realised it is.... and the make up effects are so incredible that you believe every second as David transforms into the beast. But there's so much else that's great about this 80's classic.... a superb mix of creepy horror with dark humour and crazy satire. But what else could you expect from John Landis, he deals all the time with crazy comedy, a lot of the time imbuing it with a sinister edge.... and this is no different, except this time, the horror side is the main course with the comedy edge being the extra treat.... you have your scary wolves and crazy scares but you also have a naked man with balloons and a cameo from the Muppets....

Two hapless American tourists David and Jack are on a hiking trip in the Yorkshire moors, and they stop off at a peculiar pub called The Slaughtered Lamb.... and the locals are very odd and warn of strange things afoot. They warn them to stay off the moors... but that doesn't last long. They soon find themselves off the beaten path and on the misty moors when suddenly something attacks them.... Jack is ripped to shreds and David is severely wounded. Soon afterwards, very odd things begin to happen.... David is visited by ghostly apparitions of a very messy looking Jack who warns of change to come, and he also has very strange visions and dreams including an memorably terrifying episode in which his family is besieged by an army of Nazi werewolves whilst watching The Muppet Show.

Soon enough, David undergoes 'that' change, the infamous transformation scene and the chaos begins.... he wakes up in strange places with no memory and has to steal balloons to protect his modesty in a very funny moment. The only true friend (apart from the ghostly Jack who keeps appearing in funny fashion) is the kindly nurse he befriends while recovering, Alex (Jenny Agutter) who soon seems to be the only one to try and help him.... with even the doctors stumped, including the great Frank Oz in a fun cameo....

One of the many wonderful movies that John Landis brought the world during the 1980s (Animal House, Trading Places, Blues Brothers, the Thriller video, Three Amigos, Spies like Us, Coming to America) like previously said, this is a great mix of true spooky horror with some very witty dark humour and knockabout comedy moments.... a really great example of the horror comedy genre (later also perfected by Shaun of the Dead and Ghostbusters) and a bonafide classic not just in the patheon of 80s movies but also the horror genre itself.... it's defined make up artist Rick Bakers career as well as the careers of its stars who later went on to mixed success with the movies....

Spooky, visceral, creepy but also funny... this is a true piece of great 80's popcorn entertainment.... just keep off those moors!

8. Psycho (1960) Rated 15
   Directed by Alfred Hitchcock

In the history of movies, the history of horror movies, suspense, thrillers... you name it, it's bound to be something the late, great and amazing Alfred Hitchcock pioneered and mastered in his time... with movies like Vertigo, North by Northwest, Frenzy, Rear Window and The Birds amongst many others... he revitalised genres and set templates for years to come, and none more than the jaw-dropping thriller Psycho, which back in its time, maybe even today... is shocking, twisty and never quite obvious in where it's heading... it's big twist amongst many was a pioneer for movie twists ever since but there's so much more to this than that.... it's a brutally effective exercise in tension and mis-direction....

The story leads as such.... the beautiful Marion Crane (Janet Leigh) steals from the place where she works, she steals $40, 000 and skips town with it. After this, the police are on the search for her... she stops at a motel run by a creepy fellow by the name of Norman Bates.... she goes to take a shower and then... well if you don't know by now! The sudden shocking incident only partway through the movie shifts everything to the side so much that you don't know what to expect.... never mind the shocking revelations that occur even later on.... safe to say you're never sure if it's Norman who is at fault or whether someone else is doing the deeds... and the way it all comes together is just ingenious and a real wonder of narrative and tension....

It's a classic for a reason, from the inspired cast of characters to it's beautifully textured plot and the way it plays out... it's shocks are memorable and well orchestrated, a good few of them defining of the genre, whether the horror genre or just the standard genre of movie twists if you can call that a genre. The character of Norman Bates is fairly and very iconic, from the story arc the character takes to the legacy he left in numerous sequels through to the pretty terrific prequel TV show Bates Motel, currently about to enter a third season. It's one of those films, like Soylent Green, The Sixth Sense, Planet of the Apes, Usual Suspects, Crying Game, or Empire Strikes Back that you still don't want to give the game away, even though the big reveal is pretty famous and well known.... to a massive degree. Now, please be quiet... don't want to wake mother!

7. Dawn of the Dead (1978) Rated 18
   Directed by George.A.Romero

The zombie genre is so big, it's gigantic... from Walking Dead to Zombeavers via 28 Days Later, it's going as strong now as it has been since at least the 70s, and the guy who started all this off was one George.A.Romero with his 60s classic Night of the Living Dead, which still endures to this day. Following on from such an iconic debut, Dawn wasn't his next film directly (that would be Season of the Witch) but it was his next dabble into the world of the Zombies (a term coined in West Africa and related to Voodoo and later re-defined by Romeros' movies) was this ultra classic from the 70s.

Whereas the original Dead movie dealt with the initial outbreak and a rag tag bunch of survivors holing up in a small farm house and dealing with the inevitable onslaught of the undead... this 70s' sequel ups the ante and the location, by following a group of survivors amid the outbreak as they seek refuge in a shopping mall and the chaos that follows. This being a Romero movie, it deals with many issues as well as simply being a tense Zombie movie. It deals with the need for consumerism as we head time and time again to the shopping malls to shop away... the vision of zombies mindlessly flocking to the mall a big satirical slant on the way things were going in the late 1970s, and is still particularly pertinent today, some things are always relevant.

One thing Romero does particularly well in this case too is mixing the tension, the horror and the gore with a rather jovial bent, there's humour aplenty and some slapstick too to lighten the mood without ever jarring... sure it's slightly dated but its still a good relief from the mounting tension and helps you be at ease. The one thing this does fantastically well though that is definetly a template for future movies of this genre and even something Night of the Living Dead did beautifully is creating chemistry between its cast so you get to know and care about them before everything goes wrong... it helps the drama move along fantastically and places real stakes on events. It's a major key to making this film works and it pays off beautifully in plenty of scenes as it moves towards it climax....

Between the mixture of terror and satire and daft humour, and between the great mix of character development and a simple structure... there's plenty of great reasons this remains a classic to this day despite a silliness that can date it at times. Zach Snyder did a bang up job of rebooting it for a new generation in 2004, with the fast zombies and modern culture making it a forever prevelant tale that worked as well now as it did then.... the follow up Day of the Dead proved fruitful in pervaying further messages about the 80s, but it never quite stands above what Dawn pulls off in spades....

That's your lot for now, until then...

You stay classy planet earth!