Rob at the Movies!
The summer of 2011- Mega Epic Super Fun Happy Piranha Party Crazy Hasselhoff Dancing Sheep Preview of What’s to come!
Well it’s been way far too long all my followers! (If there are any of you actually there reading this blog, hello? Give us a wave!) It’s definitely time for a new blog and what better to do at this most randomly weathered time of year (seriously, one day it’s glorious and the next day its Sean Connery’s weather stick gone crazy!) than to trawl through the absolutely massive and not so massive but still well cool movies heading this way, I won’t bother with the stinkers, though there doesn’t seem to be many looking at it which is refreshing, though it’s early days yet! Anything from Smurfs through to Cars II could end up like a Crystal Skull or a Revenge of the Fallen, and we don’t want that do we? (And that goes to you George and Steven, please make Indy 5 good, please!!!!)
But I hear you cry! (Well you’re probably not crying out, but you may be thinking it... if not thinking it, then you told someone whilst at WH Smith that you may consider mumbling it at some point) What have you been up to since we last were graced by a blog? Well for starters, I’ve been on two holidays... that’s right! Two holidays! Firstly I went to Kefallinia for a week, which was lovely, really warm and hot throughout... nice pool and villa and a few nice places to go, including the delightful Myrtos Beach with its beautiful sea and great caves.
That was a really nice holiday and was well enjoyed but my favourite holiday this year only lasted two days and a smidgen and it was.... drum roll.... the St Marks 20-30’s Cell Weekend Away... woop and such! This was up at a place called Fawcett Mill up in Penrith, and we stayed from Friday June 10th 5pm through to Sunday June 12th at 3pm and it was epic in every single sense!
We’ll get to the Great Mountain Adventure Spectacle shortly, firstly we can start from the start: Great lovely car journey with Ben Cockayne, Cath Talbot and Rich Edwards and then we arrived and had some pizza and everyone was there: Ruth, Dalj and Reuben, Ben Houghton, Paul and Sarah, Sarah DD, Ste Kearns, Mark and Toni Wade, Anna and Steve, Frank, Katie and Toby, Matt and Jen plus Noah and Bella. The evening continued with some games including an awesome quiz, (Ben Cockayne decided to randomly pop in the sauna) our team didn’t win I don’t think but we were called ‘Albino Masai Warriors’ and that’s all that counts, awesome name! Then we stayed up late chatting about whatever, the less said about Ste’s stories the better!
THE ADVENTURES AND MIS-ADVENTURES OF SATURDAY JUNE 12TH 2011 AND THE TALE OF ULLSWATER MOUNTAIN!
Saturday morning, fantastic cooked breakfast and a perfectly chilled out morning with a fantastic session done by Mark and Toni, really great teachings and all that, then we made our packed lunches and headed off out, and this is where the fun really starts! So everything was fine and dandy, off we went and we parked in a car park and I chatted to the sheep as you do... then we went to get on the ferry, this is where I think the trouble started because we ‘faffed around so much deciding what we were doing (we could get on the boat at this time or wait for another one, and walk back or get a later one back or just drive back, I was confused in the end!) that I had no idea realistically when we coming back and at the time just thought I’ll go with it later and follow the pack, which will haunt me later! So we got the boat, and I enjoyed my lovely dinner with a Sprite I bought from the shop beforehand and saved my Fresh Orange carton I had brought (love how like in a film, this is another thing that is important later on!) and we enjoyed the boat ride and got off. At this point, we were wandering down and I thought jokingly in my head ‘Ha we could climb a mountain’ and not long after... Alex, Ben, Christian, Cath, Ben C and Steve all wandered down saying ‘We’ll go climbing this mountain’ and I thought ‘heck yeah that’ll be well cool’ and followed on. We were doing fine to start with, we got pretty high and I was completely snookered and as you do, we stopped half a dozen times. Then it got interesting, Ben C and Steve had gone way ahead so it was me, Cath, Alex, Ben H and Christian who was the first to go back down, then after me and Cath got a bit higher I’m assuming Ben and Alex went back because I didn’t see them again till much later and this is the point my brains probably dropped out and my ambition and adventure pride points took over.
I saw Cath sat down a bit further down and at the time thought she would be ok, I think may I thought Ben and Alex were still around, not really sure what I thought but probably thought Cath would be ok so carried on going... it must be said at this point, I had assumed Ben and Steve would be waiting at the top, but considering how long I took I don’t know why I thought that! So I carried on going a bit and then got to what I thought was going to be the top... I could still see Cath and I had said I’ll get to the top as I thought that’s what it was. It wasn’t and I laid down for a while and decided to have my Fresh Orange (see how my clever skills with the Sprite paid off! Albeit not intentionally) and once suitably refreshed and pumped up I decided I had enough of the energy to keep on going up the mountain, I’d got this far and was doing rather well so I’ll see if I can reach the top... this is the point I perhaps should have thought if Cath was ok or told her where I was going, or thought that Ben and Steve may have left the top by this point... but no, all I thought was let’s get to the top of the moment, yes it’s a stupid thing but we all do these things when we have a goal in our sights! So I basically kept on going bit by bit, and to be fair I did look down occasionally and see that Cath was still there though by the time I reached the top I couldn’t see her anymore sadly.
But yep, I kept on pushing up the hill and after a lot of walking I got to the top... I tell you now I have never felt better in my life, the feeling of making it to the top where only Ben and Steve had made it and everyone else was either back with the others somewhere or on the way down, I felt amazing and so full of fun and passion and vigour and excitement that it’s hard to describe exactly how happy and amazing I felt, this lasted for a while but it didn’t last forever. But anyway I got to the top, felt amazing and shouted a bit going ‘woo’ and ‘Let’s Have Pancakes’ classic quote! Then before I decided I best get going back down, my brain finally snapped into place and thought right what time is the boat and after all that confusion earlier I had just thought ‘Sure it’s 4:30pm, if I get going now I should be fine’ and tbh had it actually been at 4:30 I would have made perfect timing but that sadly wasn’t to be.
Firstly though, before I decided to make a descent I thought ‘Woah man, you’re on top of this marvellous hill with all of God’s nature before you... it’s a peaceful and tranquil moment, it’s definitely time for some Prayer and God Time, around 5 minutes should do’ so I stayed there for five minutes and had a bit of prayer and a bit of reflection on what the week ahead would hold and some goals for the week ahead... and the second I got the best idea the sun just suddenly appeared from behind the clouds, it was like God was agreeing with my words and it was a moment of pure brilliance and bliss, so with my mind renewed and a great sense of pride and happiness in my heart... I decided to scramble my way back down to get back to the ferry, still thinking it was at 4:30pm (I saw a boat leave but thought nah can’t be it in my foolishness). I basically made my way down, scrambling rocks both on my bum and walking very carefully, passing by some sheep rather, ba dum, sheepishly! Even banging my elbow on a rock and making a painful graze, oops! But I managed down all that eventually and got onto the easy point, the casual run/ walk down to the main road... which I did brilliantly with the aid of my iPod and the likes of Journey, Queen and the Offspring... until I found Cath and that’s when I realised how whilst I had been up there in my own world getting all psyched and happy about getting up a hill and having a pray and all that, everything down below had gone completely awry, a true sense of ‘head completely in the clouds’.
Firstly it turns out the boat was at 15:55 so I’d way missed it and not only that but Cath and everyone else had wondered where I’d got to... which I lay completely at my feet, I didn’t have my phone and most hadn’t realised what was going on, so by all accounts I was lost even if I had simply gone up a hill and down again. I do scratch my head and wonder how I could really have been lost when all I did was go up and come down... surely it doesn’t take long to figure out that where I would be? But anyway, that is what happened and Cath whilst trying to come back down had really badly injured herself and was stuck near the bottom waiting for Ben and Steve to come and help her and then find me... from there, most of the fun and excitement I had felt didn’t really matter anymore. Yep I had the time of my life up that hill but I definitely made a silly decision not to let people know where I was. But we waited and finally we were found and went home. It was the infamous story of the weekend and we both sat around in the evening feeling pretty silly, but thankfully everyone got back ok and everyone is alright now in the end. Worst thing for me was when I got back to the cottage and found I couldn’t walk properly which completely took me by surprise, thankfully after a Sat evening of painful legs and most of Sunday and Monday they feel fine now... maybe I clearly need more exercise because it must have taken my legs by surprise all that walking, oh dear! And that’s that story!
In a nutshell for the rest of the weekend because I’ve waffled too much about my adventure, which might as well become a book and a James Franco/ Danny Boyle film I’ve written so much! The rest of the evening consisted of some awards (I won Biggest Facebook Nut, shock!) and then Me, Mark, Ben C, Steve and Frank spent the evening in the sauna, really nice and hot and for some reason we decided to swim in the freezing cold river straight after, which was mental! Thankfully I only had a brief dip! Oh and we had a cracking game of Articulate, stayed up late chatting again and then off to bed... Sunday we had a fantastic roast dinner, mucked around most of the morning and afternoon, packed up and went home. It was a truly brill weekend with it’s up and downs but a great weekend and I love every single friend from both cell groups so much, such brilliant people!
Yeah, and apart from that... everything else is cool, usual job stuff with extra help from good ol’ i2i now as well as Jobcentre and Remploy... usual great cell nights and some great films (X-Men First Class, Kung Fu Panda 2 and Bridesmaids are all amazing excellent! Green Lantern was alright, bit more on that later) as well as great times with friends and some fantastic TV shows still on (just finished- Fringe, Game of Thrones and Glee, still brilliant- Chuck, Castle, How I Met Your Mother). It’s also just been my birthday! Woop yay and all those other words, huzzah I heard you cry! (Or not) I had a well awesome day on Thursday, as well as the wall posts flooding in on Facebook, the best place for birthday wishes! I went to Manchester for the day, a nice place to do everything (though Liverpool’s good too, it’s more pricey on the train! Easier to get to though, always the way!!) and I bought tons and tons with money both that I got off my Nana and that I got off Frank from the weekend away... and just money I had saved away that I thought I’d use.
I bought some cracking stuff from HMV (Four Lions, Danny Boyle’s The Beach and Mean Girls/ Election on DVD, Buried and Due Date on Blu ray, Foo Fighters and Bowie CD’s plus a Soundtrack CD, 127 Hours book and a Back to the Future t-shirt, good times!), some goodies and sweets from Selfridges, a new Jigsaw from WH Smith and I think that’s it! I then went on to see Green Lantern at the Printworks in the 3D that was ok but nothing special (best bit was the Transformers Dark of the Moon trailer, now that’s awesome 3D!) but I was sure to sit right near the front for a change, I thought you gotta live, immerse yourself in the film, cause if you sit far back then it’s clear you’re just watching a screen, gotta feel like you’re there! I also treated myself to a juicy hot dog plus a white chocolate buttons milkshake, dreamy! I also had a awesome party last night, all the guys from church or The Unit came (more or less, we had Ben ‘Care Bear’ Houghton, Cameron ‘Superted’ Don Duncan, Mark ‘Fox’ Talbot, Nathan ‘Marshmellow Man’ Talbot, Ben and Abbi Cockers, The Dynamic Dixon Duo, Finchers, Beckers and Checkers as well as the super talented Micki Consiglio (who had a awesome party night on Friday, which was awesome, laser tag and Mafia!), Beth Clark and Joe Bright, Joey Penny, Jonny Bennett, Sarah Indique Smith, the lovely Alex and Emma, and the Berry trilogy, Nesha Ranina and Tonia. It was a cracking night with loads of food, music and catapulting water down the street! Good times! Cheers to you all if you’re reading, stone cold legends!
This week sees yet another of The Unit to come, which will clearly be awesome, always is! But anyway, I think that’s more than enough for the intro on this one, so onto the main event and a peek at what treats are in store this summer at the cinema!
Summer Preview
Every Summer comes with bags of expectations when it comes to the movies, because every Summer comes with a bevy of hit movies that everyone is going to want to see (2005 had Batman Begins, War of the Worlds, Fantastic Four, Hitchhikers Guide to the Galaxy and the final Star Wars prequel whilst 2007 had Transformers, The Simpsons Movie, Die Hard 4, Pirates of the Caribbean 3, Harry Potter Five, and the final Bourne movie) and this Summer is absolutely no exception! From the final ever Harry Potter tale, via plenty of superheroes, sequels featuring talking cars, robots in disguise, and plenty of horror as well as a few unique originals featuring a bevy of talent including the Summer Blockbuster cliché himself Steven Spielberg. Settle down, grab the nearest tub of toffee popcorn and large Sprite and get ready to find out what you’re not going to want to miss!
The Green Lantern (12A) (Out Now)
It seems there are so many comic book movies out this year and this summer especially and in the foreseeable future, so it is very nice that one arrives that is not from powerhouse Marvel but from DC Comics, the powerhouse behind Superman and Batman... and this latest superhero if you didn’t know, is the Green Lantern, but please don’t confuse it with the Green Hornet! The ever awesome Ryan Reynolds takes on the mantle of Hal Jordan, a pilot who stumbles upon a dying alien and is bestowed with powers that come from a mysterious green ring, he is then inducted into the Lantern Corps and is trusted with safeguarding the universe and Earth from dastardly forces, not least Parallax... a deadly force which has wormed it’s way into the mind of scientist Hector Hammond (Peter Saarsgard), and is bent on destruction! It was always going to be tricky to get it right with a lot of the effects and the otherworldly settings, and early reports and reviews were less than kind, but I remained faithful that if anyone could get it right it’s Goldeneye and Zorro director Martin Campbell, and with a cast that included Tim Robbins and Mark Strong, it provides some quality even if it doesn’t wind up scaling the heights that both Thor and X-Men have already done thus far this summer. It’s silly fun in the mould of the Fantastic Four movies rather than the Batman ones, the cast are fine if a bit average at times (Mark Strong is his surname throughout though!) but the effects are cool, the action fun and it’s a diverting bit of fun till the real Superhero epics come along....
Bridesmaids (15) (June 24th)
Every summer has that breakout comedy, be it 2005’s double whammy of The Wedding Crashers and The 40-Year Old Virgin, 2007’s Knocked Up, 2009’s The Hangover, or even Mean Girls in 2004. For the tone of this year’s corker of a comedy, think closer to The Hangover but not quite... and I’ve had the pleasure of seeing this gem already and to be honest, I liked it twice as much as The Hangover. But it’s a different kettle of fish anyway, whereas The Hangover is a series of wacky events and laddish comedy... this is a upfront tale, with all the crazy humour but basically telling a story rather than all the flashbacks and crazy situations of The Hangover. Sure there are some bonkers moments; the wedding fitting scene is a uncomfortable hoot! But this is all about the characters and their story in more of a sense, and all the cast are terrific in making the characters feel real... it’s no shock that this is produced by Judd Apatow, behind such great character comedies like Knocked Up and Funny People.
The plot follows lonely single Annie (the fantastic Kristen Wiig, seen before in Walk Hard and Paul amongst others) as she finds out her best friend Lillian (Maya Rudolph) is getting married and she wants Annie to be maid of honour, which seems straightforward until you factor in not only how much chaos and hard work is bound to ensue, but also that Lillian’s newer best friend Helen, a very proper and stuck up type, also wants to be maid of honour, and is bound to show Annie up at every single turn. I don’t need to go into details because discovering the characters and the situations is a complete joy in itself, full of hilarious moments, great dialogue, and a superb support cast that features not only the epic Jon Hamm (brilliantly crass as Annie’s ‘special friend’) but also a sweet love interest character for The IT Crowd’s Chris O’Dowd (aka the only good thing in Gulliver’s Travels) as well as a role for Matt Lucas as Annie’s flatmate), brilliantly funny sweet and just superb throughout... make a date for Bridesmaids now!
Transformers: Dark of the Moon (12A) (June 29th)
You know that it is well and truly the summer time when Michael Bay unleashes yet another instalment of his giant Robot franchise, this time Professor Bay is hoping that with this, his third and possibly final Robot showdown, that he’ll hopefully wipe away some (or all) of the shame left by the increasingly underwhelming (if pretty and exciting in parts) Revenge of the Fallen. Shot in 3D and apparently way way darker (though they always say that!) than the two previous movies, it is hoped that this will not only be a return to form for the franchise but it could well be the best one yet, (if they can retain the awe inspiring IMAX visuals that saved the second film and match them with the first film’s enjoyability, they could well do!) here’s hoping! Plus with a cast that this time around includes Patrick Dempsey, John Malkovich and Frances McDormand, it seems there is no shortage of character actors, so you can hope to expect some good drama amidst the action. Whatever winds up being the result, it’s bound to be big, dumb, loud and great fun... but hopefully this time given it’s the final showdown (another one of those) it’s bound to just that bit dark and intriguing too... then again it’s Transformers, don’t expect Citizen Prime!
Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II (12A) (July 15th)
If there is any other movie coming out from the end of April right through to the dark and spooky nights of September that is even mildly more anticipated than this final ever instalment of the fantastic Harry Potter franchise, then really I’m all ears and I would absolutely love to hear from you! This is where it all ends, after seven previous movies and a lot of danger and peril for the young boy wizard; it’s finally time for him to rid the world of the dastardly Lord Voldemort (Ralph Fiennes) once and for all. But there’s a long road to this outcome, one that takes in dragons and bank heists, as well as the battle to end all battles that will engulf and destroy the once so stately and beautiful Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, to give it its full title. Suffice to say, it’s doomsday for the world of Potter and co!
From first defeating the disembodied soul of Voldemort (which has attached itself to the back of Professor Quirrell’s (Ian Hart) head) back in 2001’s first instalment, the road to peace in the Wizarding world has been a long one... Harry then had to defeat his nemesis again in Chamber of Secrets when his soul began terrorising the school via an old diary of Tom’s (Voldemort’s old past name was Tom Riddle) and then he took a backseat in the franchise’s best Prisoner of Azkaban in 2004 to a edgier tale of back story and different foes before returning in 2005’s Goblet of Fire a fully fledged villain reborn and ready to rule the world as it were... all this and all the various back stories and plot points (that diary was a horcrux, they’re important in the finale!) have led to this final showdown and if you need more story then you clearly need to go back and watch the movies from start to finish, it’s one great big blockbusting saga and it will be such a shame to see it go, but go it will with one huge bang! Book your tickets now and settle in for the finale to end all finales!
Cars II (U) (July 22nd)
Yep, it’s yet another one of the sequels of the summer, though this time it’s a least an animated one, and unfortunately despite it being a Pixar event it’s probably one of the lesser anticipated sequels of the Summer, that’s not to say that it’s any less hyped but considering how average compared to Pixar’s other many stellar efforts 2006’s Cars was, then all hopes are only really mild at best for this spy action-laden sequel, which at least looks like it’s going to up all of the action and the entertainment value. Real star of the original Mater (voiced with lovely goofiness by US celebrity Larry the Cable Guy), winds up this time getting embroiled with British spy cars (led by Michael Caine and Jason Isaacs) and all sorts of spy shenanigans involving cars of course, occur. Given the negativity towards the original movie though, Cars 2 actually looks excellent fun and should be a brilliant addition to the blockbuster season, with fantastic action sequences, some funny dialogue and a great voice cast, just don’t go in expecting anything of the Toy Story or Up variety...
Horrible Bosses (15) (July 22nd)
It can’t all be big blockbusters, franchises, animations, sequels, comic book movies and 3D spectacles... we need more comedies, which is where this superb looking dark comedy comes in... From the director of the sublime documentary King of Kong (he also directed Four Christmasses, but how that’s credentials I don’t know) and starring a array of superb talent including Kevin Spacey, Colin Farrell, Jason Bateman, Jamie Foxx, Jason Sudeikis, as well as what looks like a rare funny turn by Jennifer Aniston plus newcomer Charlie Day; this centres around basically a group of three male losers who are in various trouble at work with their bosses and conspire to kill them basically, employing a disposal expert (Foxx) to help them out. Jason’s character is in line for a promotion by boss Spacey until that goes all pear shaped... Day’s character is being harassed at his work as a Dentist’s assistant by Dental nurse Aniston in what looks like a particularly funny part, whilst Sudeikis has an odious balding boss played by Farrell. Expect dark laughs, a great cast and one of the darkest and funniest premises of the summer...
Captain America- The First Avenger (12A) (July 29th)
Well, so far in the last few years we’ve had the two excellent Iron Man movies, the second and superior Hulk reboot and most recently the excellent movie version of Thor... and now in the midst of the Summer, it seems we have more or less the last piece of the Avengers puzzle, the hotly anticipated movie debut of that elusive American hero Captain America, who has proven tragically before to be a very tough concept to get right (see the disastrous 90’s movie attempt as proof, or just don’t!) and he is now being made into an all-action 1940’s war epic with the wonderful Chris Evans taking on the mantle of Steve Rogers, who will be battling Hugo Weaving’s dastardly Red Skull with the aid of a support cast that includes Stanley Tucci, Toby Jones, Tommy Lee Jones and Hayley Atwell as the female love interest and sidekick. Plus there’s also the bonus of Dominic Cooper as Howard Stark, inventor father of Iron Man. If this is done right, this should and will be a rollicking good ride that brilliantly sets up one of the most infamous superheroes for the ensemble movie to end them all... The Avengers! Marvel hasn’t let us down thus far, so all fingers crossed for a film that if done right may just blow away every other movie of the summer...
Super 8 (12A) (August 5th)
Do you remember the good old times of the 70’s and 80’s? The sweet nostalgia and popcorn, a much more innocent time for movies and blockbusters in general, where simple family tales of otherworldly adventures and small town America came along with very little hype and a lot of special surprises in store, where the threat of the Internet and the spoiler heavy forums were a very distant memory and each individual movie came along like a nice undiscovered gem? You don’t get that anymore really... but JJ Abrams and Steven Spielberg sure do remember the time, Steve himself created most of that era’s classics too, like Gremlins, The Goonies, E.T, Close Encounters... whereas JJ came pretty close to what he’s doing here with the superb Cloverfield.
They’ve now collaborated on a homage to just that sort of little genre, the family adventure drama with a sprinkling of action and menace, though maybe the 12A would indicate it’s not quite E.T! Very little is known at the moment, bar that it involves the Super 8 camera, a bunch of kids in small town America, filming their own little movie adventure and then stumbling upon an adventure involving creatures from another world and Area 51 and cover ups and the government, and there will of course be much excitement, suspense and terror along the way... and all done in an old fashioned style. Throwback Movie of the summer? Or possibly even Movie of the summer? With these two joining forces, and this sort of nostalgic excitement, it might well be!
Mr. Popper’s Penguins (PG) (August 5th)
Jim Carrey is back! Oh yes, roll out the party poppers it’s time for a party... my all time favourite actor, the one guy who always makes smile and has a huge place in my heart, is back with a new family movie based on a children’s book... they always seem to be good fun (Jumanji, Shrek, Nanny McPhee, and so on). In this, he plays a millionaire who as always is slightly estranged from his family, and then inherits an unusual gift. A bunch of slipping and sliding penguins, which then proceed to take over his life, and transform his penthouse into a glacial cave of arctic proportions.
Slapstick and life lessons ensue of course... not much needs to be said for this one really, it’s got Jim Carrey doing what he does best (see Bruce Almighty, The Mask, The Grinch for good family films!) and it’s from a cracking director in this field, Mark Waters (Spiderwick Chronicles, Mean Girls, Ghosts of Girlfriends Past, Just like Heaven) and it has a solid support including Angela Lansbury, who is always welcome on screen and the lovely Carla Gugino, in a role slightly different from the one she took in Sucker Punch, just a bit! And such friendly faces as Phillip Baker Hall and Jeffrey Tambor, plus the lovely newcomer Ophelia Lovibond, fresh from stealing the show in Noel Clarke’s 4321. Expect friendly family fun for all ages...
The Smurfs (U) (August 10th)
Yep, you did read that right... no need to find your glasses or rub your eyes for twenty minutes, there is going to be a Smurfs movie in cinemas this summer! No wait; please come back... this actually could be really great fun. I mean, come on, what exactly did you expect from a live action Smurfs movie anyway? It was always going to seem just a bit strange, but if this is done right, then it could be a huge bag of unadulterated fun. For starters, it has the most legendary dude in the universe Neil Patrick Harris starring alongside Glee’s gorgeous Jayma Mays as a couple in New York who accidentally stumble upon the eponymous Blue fellows of the title and then must help protect them from the evil Gargamel (Hank Azaria, character villain du jour!) who has chased them out of their village and into our real world... basically expect a mix of Alvin and the Chipmunks style silliness with an Enchanted style plot fusion of real and fantasy worlds, and then fun for all the family should then ensure! Get yourself Smurfed!
Rise of the Planet of the Apes (12A) (August 12th)
Every franchise no matter how long and dormant it is, will eventually get a new chance at a fresh start, and after 2001’s misconceived (but I found enjoyable) effort from Tim Burton with that completely silly ending... 20th Century Fox are taking us back to the start to see how those clever damn apes got so clever and ruthless... in the style of well worked recent classics like Batman Begins, X-Men First Class, Casino Royale, Star Trek and so on... if it’s a prequel it’s a solution! James Franco stars as a scientist who has invented a cure for Alzheimer’s and has been testing it on the chimps (this makes sense how?) who then suddenly begin growing in intelligence... will they become intelligent enough to revolt and overrun the city and the world? Hmm, they don’t call it Planet of the Apes for nowt! A decent enough cast including Franco, Slumdog’s Frieda Pinto and Tom Felton of Potter fame star with direction from The Escapist’s Rupert Wyatt... I really don’t know what to make of this at the moment, the trailer is intriguing yet a bit silly... the sight of apes revolting can’t be taken seriously by me just yet.... watch this space!
Cowboys and Aliens (12A) (August 19th)
Easily one of my most anticipated movies of the Summer, it seems that there are far too many reasons to want to see this movie... firstly there’s that title alone, the Wild West meets outer space, sounds awesome just thinking about it... but then you can factor into it that it stars both Indiana Jones (Harrison Ford), and James Bond (Daniel Craig), as well as a great support cast that includes Olivia Wilde, Paul Dano, Clancy Brown and the fantastic Sam Rockwell. Plus it happens to be directed by Jon Favreau, he of Iron Man 1 and 2, Zathura and Elf and not only that, then it’s also got the executive producer stamp from Mr Spielberg (though he does walk around stamping everything from Flintstones to Zorro)... the plot itself probably doesn’t need much introduction, Dan Craig’s cowboy wakes up in the west and wonders where he was (the old Amnesia chestnut), and then before he can figure that out... the nasty ol’ Aliens invade and he must team up with grizzled Sheriff Harrison Ford to stop the invasion and save the west. I probably don’t need to say much more at this point, there are so many reasons to see it, so why not just book your ticket, sit in anticipation and be done with it!
Final Destination 5 (15) (August 26th)
Yep, like the Saw movies before it, the Final Destination series is one that ironically is choosing to cheat death again and again and just won’t die. Yet after the lacklustre fourth movie, hopes were low about any quality being bandied about in a fifth instalment, yet with a recent trailer (it’s always the trailer that seals it) interest piqued as this looks a look more intriguing and daring than the fourth movie, and though the 3D for the fourth was its strongpoint, it looks like the 3D here may be even better, as well as a plot involving a suspension bridge accident and some new more dark demises. Don’t go expecting anything profound, but if you’ve followed this series and enjoyed them, then expect to be ending the summer with a jolt... plus Tony Todd is back, worth the ticket price on its own!
What else is there to see?
I’ve covered the real big smashes and the ones I’m really hyped for, but there’s still a considerable trove of other decent movies out there this summer that should be worth your time. First up on July 1st jostling with the Autobots for audience attention is Tom Hanks and Julia Roberts in old school romantic comedy Larry Crowne, where Hanks’ character goes back to college and tries to impress lecturer Roberts, directed by Hanks too, expect old school charm and sweetness.
In the weeks between the Autobots and the Boy Wizard making his final bow, we have a big small film from mysterious director Terrence Malick with The Tree of Life (July 8th) which from what I hear is a film about the life of a man (Sean Penn) from youth to old age, with all of life thrown in (including Dinosaurs apparently), I really have no idea what it’s 100% about but that’s the jist, being Malick expect something pretty special.
(Sean Penn in The Tree of Life)
Also out that week is the new twisted comedy from the director of Slither, James Gunn.... simply titled Super, it sees Rainn Wilson as a down on his luck guy who decides to be a vigilante hero, when his wife (Liv Tyler) runs off with a smooth talking drug dealer (Kevin Bacon) and teams up with a college kid (Ellen Page) to fight crime, expect a even more twisted and dark take on the Kick-Ass template along with a fun cameo from Nathan Fillion.
Jostling for attention with Potter but probably unlikely to draw the same crowds is Grindhouse spin off Hobo with a Shotgun (July 15th) in which Rutger Hauer (Hitcher, Blade Runner) plays a tramp who simply becomes a vigilante... from what I’ve heard it makes Crank look like Dumbo, so not for the faint hearted... but expect a truly outrageous treat for those with a strong stomach and a dark sense of humour. On a different scale, ending July are two daft family films (both July 29th)... firstly Kevin James talks to the animals and flirts with Rosario Dawson in the crazy looking Zookeeper, whilst Horrid Henry makes his way to the big screen in 3D with a cast including Richard E Grant, Noel Fielding, Anjelica Huston and... Dick and Dom?
(Jessica Alba in Spy Kids 4)
As we get into August, we have a few more small treats... on one hand, we have the big screen outing for E4’s smash hit teen comedy The Inbetweeners (August 19th) so expect rude yet hilarious shenanigans abroad. Robert Rodrigruez returns to the world of Spy Kids for the fourth instalment, subtitled All the Time in the World and presented in Aroma Vision, so prepare to smell the antics of Jessica Alba as she gets back into the spy game to save the world from the evil Timekeeper (the legendary Jeremy Piven) whilst getting help from Juni and Carmen (Alexa Vega and Daryl Sabara from the first films) whilst other cast members return and new ones including Community’s Joel McHale and Ricky Gervais as the voice of a dog, fun times!
Darker fare also hits... we have the new remake outing for Conan the Barbarian (August 26th) in which Game of Thrones’ Jason Mamoa takes over the beefy role to battle Stephen Lang’s (Avatar) evil warlord in inevitable 3D. There’s the new dark thriller from Spanish director Pedro Almodovar, in which Antonio Banderas’ plastic surgeon takes dark and twisted revenge on his daughter’s tormentors, titled The Skin I Live In (August 26th). There’s a new seriously scary horror thriller from producer Guillermo del Toro, Don’t Be Afraid of the Dark (August 12th) a remake of a shocking 70’s chiller in which Guy Pearce, Katie Holmes and daughter Bailee Madison move into a new home only to find they’re not alone, and evil imps want to steal their daughter for themselves. And on a lighter note, Anne Hathaway and Jim Sturgess star in One Day (August 26th) the new romantic book adaptation from the director of An Education. That’s it for the summer, hope you’ve found some films you want to see, I know I have... can’t wait! x
And that’s it for this blog... it’s been a long one and it always is... think I’m going to stick to one a month as it takes so long to write these that I have to go back and edit it to make sure dates are current and not already dated lol, it’s crazy! Life is so fun but so busy... heck even films take a backseat at the moment sometimes, which I thought would never happen. But I’m sure I’ll still see plenty looking at my summer guide.... plus with things like The Unit, Sparks Unleashed, the various Cell groups and socials, and fun times with the St CLC Marks Family Church clan, busy times can only be fun times, yay yay! ‘Till next time my amigos...
You stay classy.... Planet Earth! X
